Sunday, May 25, 2008

A Complaint.

Things are pretty lonely around here lately. I had been seeing less and less of the group of ladies that I used to do coffee with every week and various other things throughout the week and month. I kind of suspected that maybe they were cutting me out, because whenever I would phone anyone to try to set up a playdate, I would get the öh, we're kind of busy, I have this or that to do"routine, but I found out about a week and a half ago that they actually changed the day they were doing coffee and didn't tell me about it. So I'm pretty hurt about that, becuase it means I have maybe one or two friends left in town, and one of them is really busy, and the other is part of that group and usually keeps herself really busy. So I am an extrovert with no way to recharge myself except harassing my husband, the introvert who works with people all day.

Also Aaron is in that really evil toddler stage where he's hitting and throwing and having tantrums all day long about everything. I really find this stage draining becuase they just test and test and test all day and you just feel so negative at the end of the day becuase all you did was say "no. no. no. no. no."all day and pull them off of things / take things away / relocate / distract them. He's not very distractable, so the old diverting of attention ploy doesn't really work, its usually just got to be a direct no and remove the child with much screaming and flailing. But every time I get too tired and decide to let him be and not shadow his every move, there he is breaking a plate or smashing a mug into his brother's head or falling off the table, or standing in the middle of the street with a car honking at him.

And after his weekend being the centre of daddy's attention, Andrew has decided he doesn't actually like having a brother that much most days. He's all into playing by himself and not sharing anything. If Aaron tries to join in, he usually grabs the most precious item and the result is perilous screams of outrage. I let Andrew have a few "precious"items that Aaron isn't allowed to touch. These days he wants everything, especially anything Aaron decides to play with, is a precious item. Of course, the fact that his brother is mainly interested in taking the toys so he can smash them into Andrew's head doesn't help.

And I have a major BBQ, a fund raiser car wash, and a camping trip to plan and execute in the next three weeks. But I promise I will get those giveaway items done soon. Really.


Kristin said...

oh Jill (((hugs)))

Kristen said...

Jill! Maybe we need to start our own playgroup, only with webcams :o)
And I totally get that crazy toddler stage because Jeremy has entered it (and I think I blocked out of my mind after Elijah outgrew it)...he is crazy into everything and has a huge tantrum when I take stuff away (you know I'm completely unreasonable for not letting him play with the vegetable peeler, which I had no idea he could get at)...or pinches and pulls hair and then smiles all cute when you say "ow" and "no" and "gentle" right before he does it again.

Carla said...

I'm so sorry about the coffee ladies :-(. That's really nasty. I hope that you happen upon an even greater group of ladies at a park/the library etc....

I remember that stage of toddlerhood. Thankfully not all of them go through such huge extremes (Kyla is picky and at times crotchety but not as exhausting as my boys were). I found it was at that time that I resolved that all of those toddler activities that I had previously rejected because they were too much work (playing in rice and flour; lining the floor with towels and giving them a tub of water, bubbles and kitchen implements; peanut butter playdough...)suddenly because less work than being the constant shadow. I also remember feeding Benjamin's crayon obsession at that age...he would colour quietly for 20-30 minutes then, but only with fresh, sharp crayons. It was SO worth the money. We're still making crayon crafts and candles years later with the surplus, though.

Hopefully being outdoors this summer will help, too. It does wonders for my boys (and me!) and was so worth the daily bath (it helped that my toddler boys LIKED baths, so that was another activity to fill the day with).

I'll be thinking of you!